Between Man and Woman: Questions and Answers About Marriage and Same-Sex Unions
Issued by USCCB, November 12, 2003
Copyright © 2003, United States Catholic Conference, Inc. All rights reserved.
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A growing movement
today favors making those relationships commonly called same-sex unions the
legal equivalent of marriage. This situation challenges Catholics--and all who
seek the truth--to think deeply about the meaning of marriage, its purposes,
and its value to individuals, families, and society. This kind of reflection,
using reason and faith, is an appropriate starting point and framework for the
current debate.
We, the Catholic
bishops of the United States, offer here some basic truths to assist people in
understanding Catholic teaching about marriage and to enable them to promote
marriage and its sacredness.
1. What is marriage?
Marriage, as
instituted by God, is a faithful, exclusive, lifelong union of a man and a
woman joined in an intimate community of life and love. They commit themselves
completely to each other and to the wondrous responsibility of bringing
children into the world and caring for them. The call to marriage
is woven deeply into the human spirit. Man and woman are equal. However, as
created, they are different from but made for each other. This complementarity,
including sexual difference, draws them together in a mutually loving union
that should be always open to the procreation of children (Catechism of the
Catholic Church [CCC], nos. 1602-1605).
These truths about
marriageare present in the order ofnature and can be perceived
by the light of human reason. They have been confirmed by divine
Revelation in Sacred Scripture.
2. What does our faith tell us about marriage?
Marriage comes from the
loving hand of God, who fashioned both male and female in the divine image (see
Gn 1:27). A man "leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and
the two of them become one body" (Gn 2:24). The man recognizes the woman
as "bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh" (Gn 2:23). God blesses the man and woman and commands them to "be fertile and multiply" (Gn 1:28). Jesus reiterates these teachings from Genesis, saying, "But from the beginning
of creation, 'God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave
his father and mother [and be joined to his wife], and the two shall become one
flesh.'" (Mk 10:6-8).
These biblical
passages help us to appreciate God's plan for marriage. It is an intimate union
in which the spouses give themselves, as equal persons, completely and lovingly
to one another. By their mutual gift of self, they cooperate with God in
bringing children to life and in caring for them.
Marriage is both a
natural institution and a sacred union because it is rooted in the divine plan
for creation. In addition, the Church teaches that the valid marriage of
baptized Christians is a sacrament--a saving reality. Jesus Christ made
marriage a symbol of his love for his Church (see Eph 5:25-33). This means that a sacramental marriage lets the world see, in human terms, something of
the faithful, creative, abundant, and self-emptying love of Christ. A true
marriage in the Lord with his grace will bring the spouses to holiness. Their
love, manifested in fidelity, passion, fertility, generosity, sacrifice,
forgiveness, and healing, makes known God's love in their family, communities,
and society. This Christian meaning confirms and strengthens the human value of
a marital union (CCC, nos. 1612-1617; 1641-1642).
3. Why can marriage exist only
between a man and a woman?
The natural structure
of human sexuality makes man and woman complementary partners for the
transmission of human life. Only a union of male and female can express the
sexual complementarity willed by God for marriage. The permanent and exclusive
commitment of marriage is the necessary context for the expression of sexual
love intended by God both to serve the transmission of human life and to build
up the bond between husband and wife (CCC, nos. 1639-1640).
In marriage, husband
and wife give themselves totally to each other in their masculinity and
femininity (CCC, no. 1643). They are equal as human beings but different as man
and woman, fulfilling each other through this natural difference. This unique complementarity
makes possible the conjugal bond that is the core of marriage.
4. Why is a same-sex union not
equivalent to a marriage?
For several reasons a
same-sex union contradicts the nature of marriage: It is notbased on the
natural complementarity of male and female; it cannot cooperate
with Godto create new life; and the natural purpose of sexual union
cannot be achieved by asame-sex union. Persons in same-sex unions cannot
enter into a true conjugal union. Therefore, it is wrong to equate their
relationship to a marriage. In fidelity to Scripture and Tradition, the Church
has taught consistently that sexual activity within such relationships is
gravely evil.
5. Why is it so important to
society that marriage be preserved as the exclusive union of a man and a woman?
Across times, cultures,
and very different religious beliefs, marriage is the foundation of the family.
The family, in turn, is the basic unit of society. Thus, marriage is a personal
relationship with public significance.
Marriage is the
fundamental pattern for male-female relationships. It contributes to society
because it models the way in which women and men live interdependently and
commit, for the whole of life, to seek the good of each other.
The marital union
also provides the best conditions for raising children: namely, the stable,
loving relationship of a mother and father present only in marriage. The state
rightly recognizes this relationship as a public institution in its laws
because the relationship makes a unique and essential contribution to the
common good.
Laws play an
educational role insofar as they shape patterns of thought and behavior,
particularly about what is socially permissible and acceptable. In effect,
giving same-sex unions the legal status of marriage would grant official public
approval to homosexual activity and would treat it as if it were morally
neutral.
When marriage is
redefined so as to make other relationships equivalent to it, the institution
of marriage is devalued and further weakened. The weakening of
this basic institution at all levels and by various forces has already exacted
too high a social cost.
6. Does denying marriage to
homosexual persons demonstrate unjust discrimination and a lack of respect for
them as persons?
It is not unjust to
deny legal status to same-sex unions because marriage and same-sex unions are
essentially different realities. In fact, justice requires society to do so.
To uphold God's intent
for marriage, in which sexual relations have their proper and exclusive place,
is not to offend the dignity of homosexual persons. Christians must give
witness to the whole moral truth concerning human sexuality and the dignity of
persons. Sexual intimacy is a blessing given by God for marriage only. Any
sexual activity outside marriage with others or alone is gravely evil. The
Church opposes as immoral both homosexual acts and unjust discrimination
against homosexual persons.
The Catechism of the
Catholic Church urges that homosexual persons be accepted with respect,
compassion, and sensitivity (no. 2358). It also encourages chaste friendships. "Chastity
is expressed notably in friendship with one's neighbor. Whether it
develops between persons of the same or opposite sex, friendship represents a
great good for all" (no. 2347).
7. Should persons who
live in same-sex relationships be entitled to some of the same social and
economic benefits given to married couples?
The state has an
obligation to promote the family, which is rooted in marriage. Therefore,
it can justly give married couples rights and benefits it does not extend to
others. Ultimately, the stability and flourishing of society is dependent on
the stability and flourishing of healthy family life.
The legal recognition
of marriage, including the benefits associated with it, is not only about
personal commitment, but also about the social commitment that husband and wife
make to the well-being of society. It would be wrong to redefine marriage for
the sake of providing benefits to those who cannot rightfully enter into
marriage.
Some benefits currently
sought by persons in homosexual unions can already be obtained without regard
to marital status. For example, individuals can agree to own property jointly
with another, and they can generally designate anyone they choose to be a
beneficiary of their will or to make health care decisions in case they become
incompetent.
8. In light of the Church's
teaching about the truth and beauty of marriage, what should Catholics do?
There is to be no separation
between one's faith and life in either public or private realms. All Catholics
should act on their beliefs with a well-formed conscience based on Sacred
Scripture and Tradition. They should be a community of conscience within
society. By their voice and their vote, they should contribute to society's
welfare and test its public life by the standards of right reason and Gospel
truth. Responsible citizenship is a virtue. Participation in the political
process is a moral obligation. This is particularly urgent in light of the need
to defend marriage and to oppose the legalization of same-sex unions as
marriages.
Married couples
themselves, by the witness of their faithful, life-giving love, are the best
advocates for marriage. By their example, they are the first teachers of the
next generation about the dignity of marriage and the need to uphold it. As
leaders of their family--which the Second Vatican Council called a "domestic
church" (Lumen Gentium, no. 11)--couples should bring their gifts
as well as their needs to the larger Church. There, with the help of other
couples and their pastors and collaborators, they can strengthen their
commitment and sustain their sacrament over a lifetime.
Marriage is a
basic human and social institution. Though it is regulated by civil laws and
church laws, it did not originate from either the church or state, but from
God. Therefore, neither church nor state can alter the basic meaning and
structure of marriage.
Marriage, whose nature
and purposes are established by God, can only be the union of a man and a woman
and must remain such in law. In a manner unlike any other relationship,
marriage makes a unique and irreplaceable contribution to the common good of
society, especially through the procreation and education of children.
The union of husband
and wife becomes, over a lifetime, a great good for themselves,
their family, communities, and society. Marriage is a gift to be cherished and
protected.
For Further Reading
Second Vatican Council. Pastoral Constitution on the
Church in the Modern World (Gaudium et Spes), nos. 47-52. December
1965. Available online at www.vatican.va.
Catechism of the Catholic Church, nos. 369-373, nos.
1601-1666, and nos. 2331-2400. Washington, DC: United States Conference of
Catholic BishopsLibreria Editrice Vaticana, 2000.
Pope John Paul II. On the Family (Familiaris Consortio).
Washington, DC: United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, 1982.
Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith. Considerations
Regarding Proposals to Give Legal Recognition to Unions Between Homosexual
Persons. July 2003. Available online at www.vatican.va.
United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. Follow the
Way of Love: A Pastoral Message of the U.S. Catholic Bishops to
Families. Washington, DC: United States Conference of Catholic Bishops,
1993.
United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. Faithful
Citizenship: A Catholic Call to Political Responsibility. Washington, DC: United
States Conference of Catholic Bishops, 2003.
Between Man and Woman: Questions and Answers About
Marriage and Same-Sex Unions was developed by the Committee on Marriage and
Family Life of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB). It was
approved for publication by the full body of bishops at their November 2003
General Meeting and has been authorized for publication by the undersigned.
Msgr. William P. Fay
General Secretary,
USCCB
Scripture texts used in this work are taken from the New
American Bible, copyright © 1991, 1986, and 1970 by the Confraternity of
Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. 20017, and are used by permission of the
copyright owner. All rights reserved.
Excerpts from the Catechism of the Catholic Church,
second edition, copyright © 2000, Libreria Editrice Vaticana-United States
Conference of Catholic Bishops, Inc., Washington, D.C., are used with
permission. All rights reserved.
Copyright © 2003, United States Conference of Catholic
Bishops, Inc., Washington, D.C. All rights reserved. No part of this work may
be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or
mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage
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