Marriage and Family: Pastoral Issues
This is a foundational concept and guiding paradigm for doing family ministry, and all ministries, in the Church as well as for working on behalf of families within society. It describes how we understand family and what we are trying to achieve.
A short summary of a family perspective is available on this website.
The fullest description of a family perspective and how to use it is found in the Committee publication, A Family Perspective in Church and Society: A Manual for All Pastoral Leaders. It was first published in 1988 and revised in 1998 and can be ordered from USCCB Publishing.
Living the sacramental vocation of marriage is a lifelong process of human development and Christian formation. The phases of marriage preparation – remote, proximate, immediate – are outlined by Pope John Paul II in his message On the Family (Familiaris Consortio). In its immediate phase – usually six to twelve months before the wedding – marriage preparation is offered as a “program” for engaged couples. This practice is widespread in all U.S. Catholic dioceses.
The Pontifical Council for the Family published in 1996 Preparation for the Sacrament of Marriage in which the phases of marriage preparation are summarized and practical guidance is given for catechesis and pastoral care in each of the phases.
A handbook entitled Faithful to Each Other Forever is designed specifically for priests, deacons, pastoral ministers, and leader couples involved in offering marriage preparation programs. It can be ordered from USCCB publishing.
In 1993 the Bishops’ Committee asked the Center for Marriage and Family at Creighton University to conduct a national study about the value of marriage preparation offered in the Catholic Church. The study was published in 1995 as Marriage Preparation in the Catholic Church: Getting It Right. A summary of the conclusions is available on this website and a copy of the full report can be ordered from the Center for Marriage and Family.
Increasingly, couples are living together without marriage and many are coming to marriage preparation programs with at least one experience of cohabitation. The Committee has compiled some important facts about cohabiting couples and marriage as well as a review of diocesan policies and practices being used in marriage preparation with such couples. The report Marriage Preparation and Cohabiting Couples is available on this website.
The pastoral care begun in marriage preparation must continue in the critical first years of marriage when there is a high likelihood of divorce. Recognizing this situation, the Bishops’ Committee on Marriage and Family Life, the National Association of Catholic Family Life Ministers, Catholic Engaged Encounter, and the Center for Marriage and Family at Creighton University collaborated on a project with two purposes: (1) profile newly-married couples (0-5 years) and identify their particular issues, experiences and needs; and (2) provide practical assistance to those who minister to the newly-married.
The first purpose was accomplished through a national research project published in 2000 as Time, Sex and Money: The First Five Years of Marriage by the Center for Marriage and Family at Creighton University. This report contains data on a wide range of behaviors and attitudes, as well as marital adjustment, religiosity, and problematic issues for couples. It can be ordered from the Center for Marriage and Family.
The second purpose is addressed in a handbook of resources entitled To Seal and Strengthen Love which is available from the National Association of Catholic Family Life Ministers.
“An enduring marriage is more than simply endurance. It is a process of growth into an intimate friendship and a deepening peace. So we urge all couples: renew your commitment regularly, seek enrichment often, and ask for pastoral and professional help when needed” (from the U.S. Catholic Bishops, Follow the Way of Love: A Pastoral Message to Families, 1994).
A parish can and should be a community that supports married couples in their lifetime sacramental journey.
On a national average, at least 40% of Catholics marry a Christian belonging to another denomination (interchurch marriage). These marriages have their own unique set of strengths and weaknesses. They are also similar in some ways to marriages between persons belonging to the same Christian church. The Bishops’ Committee requested a national study of this phenomenon and participated with other national denominational leaders in carrying it out. The study was published in 1999 by the Center for Marriage and Family at Creighton University as Ministry to Interchurch Marriages. Both the full report and a special summary report can be ordered from the Center for Marriage and Family.
Following the national study a new, first-ever resource has been developed for interchurch couples to use in reflection and discussion about creating a joint spiritual/religious life. It is called BRIDGES (Building Relationship Interaction, Decision-making, Growth and Enrichment through Spirituality). BRIDGES can be used by individual couples or by groups, including those who are engaged, newly-married, or long-married. It is available from the Center for Marriage and Family.
The ongoing ecumenical dialogue in the United States between the Reformed Churches and the Roman Catholic Church has produced Interchurch Families: Resources for Ecumenical Hope which can be ordered from USCCB Publishing.
The U.S. Catholic Bishops have addressed the abuse of women in home and family and also the sexual abuse of children in the same situations.
Catholic teaching is clear and firm that homosexual persons “must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, #2358). To demonstrate how such acceptance might be offered and experienced in families, especially by parents toward their children, the Committee on Marriage and Family Life wrote the pastoral statement Always Our Children. It was published in 1997 with the approval of the USCCB Administrative Committee and with subsequent review by the Vatican's Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith.
This statement was developed according to the spirit expressed by Pope John Paul II in his Apostolic Exhortation on the Family (Familiaris Consortio) in which he wrote: “An even more generous, intelligent and prudent pastoral commitment, modeled on the Good Shepherd, is called for in cases of families which, often independently of their own wishes and through pressures of various other kinds, find themselves faced by situations which are objectively difficult” (#77).
Acknowledging the physical, psychological, spiritual, social and economic effects of increased longevity, the U.S. Catholic Bishops published a pastoral message on growing older within the faith community entitled Blessings of Age in 1999 during the U.N. International Year of Older Persons.
Spiritual growth by men is essential if they are to live happily, productively, and maturely in their roles, relationships, and responsibilities -- especially in marriage and family life. New energies for spiritual renewal and evangelization are stirring among men in various religious groups. The Protestant Evangelical Promise Keepers movement has affected many lives. Programs and groups offered by Catholic men for their brothers are beginning to emerge in all parts of the country. The Committee stays in touch with these developments, and especially with leaders of Catholic men's ministries, to facilitate a connection with the Church and to promote Catholic teachings and practices within the groups.
The Committee has published three background papers on men's ministries that offer keys to understanding the phenomenon and suggestions for helping it to grow within the Catholic faith tradition:
A Catholic Perspective on Promise Keepers (1996)
Catholic Men's Ministries: An Introductory Report (1999)
Catholic Men's Ministries: A Progress Report (2002)
Also, the Bishops' Committee on Marriage and Family Life and the Committee on Evangelization have published a leadership manual entitled Hearing Christ's Call: A Resource for the Formation and Spirituality of Catholic Men. This book contains topical essays, scriptural insights, and guidelines for organizing and conducting parish-based men's groups. Order it from USCCB Publishing.
To assist dioceses, parishes, and families themselves the Bishops’ Committee developed a resource packet which contains prayers, rituals, and other family activities. Though it was originally compiled for the Jubilee Year 2000, its contents can be utilized or adapted for programs today. In addition, Catholic Household Blessings and Prayers is a valuable compendium of family prayer and ritual for all ordinary and extraordinary occasions. Order it from USCCB Publications.
The Committee on Marriage and Family works closely with the National Association of Catholic Family Life Ministers (NACFLM) to implement initiatives on behalf of marriage and family life. It also has contact with many other Catholic associations and groups that promote marriage and family life. The NACFLM website has a useful listing of links to such groups.