Is NFP Healthy for Marriages?

Mike Manhart, PhD 

We all know about the health benefits of using NFP in comparison to contraceptives. What’s perhaps more important are the benefits using NFP brings to your marriage relationship. I recently reviewed the scientific literature on the impact of NFP and contraceptives on marriage relationships for a State of the NFP Science meeting held in September. The bottom line: NFP is good for your marriage health. 

Some highlights from the published studies.   

  • A study in Chile (1) compared relationship health of couples using NFP in comparison to those using contraception (80% were using hormonal contraceptives) and found on average that all the couples had scores on the Dyadic Adjustment Scale (a measurement tool for relationship health) in the “functional “range those using NFP had significantly higher scores. They also concluded that the DAS score improved 1% for every month a couple is using NFP.
  • There are now four peer reviewed studies using a representative sample of American reproductive aged women showing that women who ever-used NFP (i.e., current or previous use) are less likely to be divorced than those who have never-used NFP (2,3,4,5). Two of these studies (4, 5) showed that ever use of common contraceptives (the pill, condom, sterilization) increased the likelihood of divorce, compared to never use of contraceptives, from 40%-200%, depending on the specific method used. In contrast, ever-use of NFP decreased the likelihood of divorce 35-49%.
  • Surveys spanning 4 decades of NFP couples consistently show couples feel they communicate better, have a more intimate relationship and, while acknowledging that abstinence is difficult at times, state using NFP is beneficial to the marriage (see reference 4 pp 3-6). 

What might explain why NFP can help marriage relationships?  Fehring and Kurz (6) conducted interviews with both NFP and contracepting couples to understand what might be driving this. They also measured Well-being, Intimacy, and Self-esteem in these couples and found the NFP users scored significantly higher in all three dimensions; consistent with the studies mentioned above. 

African American Family

They found the overall attitude the NFP couples had about their fertility was vastly different than the contracepting couples. For NFP users, Fertility is a natural process to be integrated into daily life, while contraceptive users see fertility as a medical problem to be suppressed and controlled. NFP couples tend communicate on whether they are fertile or not, whereas contraceptive users communicate on whether she is “protected” or not. The result is the women tends to be a respected partner in NFP couples while she can often become an object of sex for contracepting couples. Spiritually, NFP couples see fertility as a gift from God offering the opportunity to be co-creators in life, whereas contracepting couples tend to see fertility as something to be controlled--God doesn’t come into the discussion. 

Stepping back from the data and the numbers, I think what’s driving this is NFP is a tool for couples to use in marriage to help them live marriage as God intended it to be--fully lived, freely given, faithful (lifelong), and fruitful--sometimes in a new life, but always life-giving. Yes, it has challenges and hard times, but NFP can help the couple grow together and have a healthier marriage. 

References: 

  1. Barroilhet, Sergio, Senoret Camila, Ximena Mallea, Rosemarie Fritsch, Paul Vohringer, and Jose-Antonio Arraztoa. 2018. “Marital Functioning in Couples Practicing Periodic Abstinence for Family Planning.” The Linacre Quarterly 85, no. 2: 155–16. doi: 10.1177/0024363918764950.                                                                                                                                  
  2. Fehring, Richard Jerome. 2013. “Under the Microscope: The Influence of Ever Use of Natural Family Planning and Contraceptive Methods on Divorce Rates as Found in the 2006-2010 National Survey of Family Growth.” Current Medical Research 24, nos. 3–4: 12–16.                                                                                                                                            
  3. Fehring, Richard Jerome. 2015. “The Influence of Contraception, Abortion and Natural Family Planning on Divorce Rates as Found in the 2006-2010 National Survey of Family Growth.” The Linacre Quarterly 82, no. 3: 273–282.                                                                                                                                                          
  4. Fehring, R., Manhart, M. 2021. "Natural family planning and marital chastity: The effects of periodic abstinence on marital relationships." The Linacre Quarterly 88 (1), 42–55. https://dx. doi.org/10.1177%2F0024363920930875.                                                                                                                                     
  5. Michael D. Manhart, Richard J. Fehring. 2023. "The Association of Family Planning Methods With the Odds of Divorce Among Women in the 2015–2019 National Survey of Family Growth." Journal of Divorce & Remarriage. DOI: 10.1080/10502556.2023.2179837.                               

  6. Richard J. Fehring, William Kurz, S.J. 2000. “Anthropological Differences between Contraception and Natural Family Planning.” Life and learning IV Proceedings of the 10th Annual University Faculty for Life Conference (Fordham University). New York: Fordham University Press.  

    This article was first published in Family Foundations (January-March 2025, vol. 52, no. 1, p. 5), a publication of the Couple to Couple League. It is reprinted here with permission.